Johnny Walker Himself

Japanese children like to play with other things besides toys that are made to resemble incredibly fast passenger trains. In a country chock full of vending machines offering beer, cigarettes and pornography, you would expect those little whipper snappers would always have something to do.

But let me tell you something, you've never seen anything quite like one of these guys.

It's called a Kabuto-mushi. Translated from Japanese it just means helmet-bug. Kids play with these too, especially in the Summertime, cause apparently that's when they're born and when they like to go out and go swimming with girl bugs.

The first time I saw one, I thought it was a little robot or something. This little boy was standing in the doorway of his house and I reached down cause I thought he was offering me a stick of licorice or a lock of hair or something.

To my horror, it was not licorice at all, but one of these humongous bugs that he was just chillin' with like it was a dog or cat. I didn't understand at the time how amazing these bugs were. They even have video games in many Japanese arcades where you can play one of the bugs and fight to try to knock another bug off of your log! It's intense! Heck, I even saw Kabutomushi origami at the store.

I knew I had to have one, so about fifteen months later when I bought one of my very own.

His name: Johnny Walker

He was one of the most amazing pets I have ever had. When I bought him from the old Japanese lady, she was so excited to sell him! I found out later it was because he was so close to dying and nobody wanted to buy him.

I knew Johnny Walker needed someone to rub his feet and cook his meals after he got home from work, so I bought him a wife. I called her Sally Jo Walker.

They lived happily in my box in Toyohashi, until one day, the box started to smell...bad. I looked in the box and Johnny Walker himself had passed on. We held a funeral for him and then threw him out the window. Sally Jo was so distraught that she took her own life by jumping out the same window only a couple days later. She tried to escape from the box multiple times, so this required us to put her on a 72-hour suicide watch which failed miserably.

The bugs usually feasted on little jelly packets you buy from the 100yen store in Japan, but it wasnt enough to keep Johnny Walker alive.

His legacy lives on even if he does not.